I think of motherhood in two parts. The mum, and the job.

Mum is who I am. The creator of two delicious humans. Fixer of boo-boos, professional cuddler, the middle of the night comfort and their safe space… their home. I love that part. Being their mum is the biggest, most challenging, soul filling thing I have ever done, or will ever do. There is no love like the love you hold for your kids. None. It’s an all consuming, powerful, deep love.

But then there’s the job… and fuck me is it relentless.

A job that if I scrolled through on SEEK and read the requirements, working conditions and pay, I would click out of that add quicker than my toddler can consume a stolen snack. #hardpass

But mums don’t get to tap out (well, some choose to, but this isn’t about those types of humans). The job of motherhood is the MOST unrecognised and for the most part, unappreciated jobs in the entire world. I mean, women literally BUILD HUMANS FROM SCRATCH. Organs, hair, skin, BONES. Then we birth them. The human we built and carried for 9-10 months then exists our body in a mental and physical marathon event. Which I’m told comes close to the pain a man feels when they’re struck down with a sniffle. After birth we barely get time to process what had happened, before we’re thrust into a cycle of changing the babies nappy and our own. Working out how to breastfeed, hold a baby (which if you’ve never actually held a newborn before, it’s slightly bloody terrifying. They’re SO SMALL. If you’ve got other kids at home, you’ve got them on your mind. You miss them. You wonder how their emotions are going to cope with this new edition. You leave the hospital a tired, bleeding version of you. The days are a blur. You’re dying for a shower and to rest. Those first months pass in a whirlpool of emotions. Tears, laughs and so many moments of self doubt and comparison to other new mums. Building and birthing a human is the hardest, greatest thing your body will ever do.

Now you’ve emerged from your fourth trimester, things get easy, right? Incorrect. Motherhood never gets easier, you get stronger.

The job of motherhood is everything that comes with a tiny human.

• The washing. My god the never fucking ending piles of washing.

• Dishes

• Cooking

• Cleaning

• Nappy changes

• Baths

• Bedtime routine (which I LOATH now my toddler is a threenager)

• Constantly picking up toys. All. Of. The. Time.

• Groceries - not just popping to the store. But you have to think of what to cook, what ingredients you need, then you have to physically GET to the shops.

• Doctors appointments

• Dental check ups

• Swimming lessons

• Day care

• Playgroups

• Sports

• Making sure the kids have the clothes and shoes they need. Bloody hell they grow fast don’t they?!

• Snacks - constantly fetching snacks

• Making sure the house is stocked with supplies

• Packing school bags

• Logistically trying to leave the house for your own appointments now takes weeks of planning and checking the schedules of at least 3 other grown ups

• Keeping track of birthdays, remembering to buy gifts

• Remembering to check in on your friends and family members

• The night shift - this is where, as mums, we average about 4 hours of sleep a night, especially around teething, sickness, sleep regressions, nightmares. I haven’t slept properly in three years..

I’m sure I’m missing things from the above. This is a very general overview. Then there’s medical mums, solo mums, mums navigating disabilities. It’s a job we’re not paid for. It’s a job you can’t truly ever prepare for. But it’s a job that every single day, millions of women do. We get up, and we keep going. Because we love those tiny humans more than life itself. We know this phase is temporary, and soon they’ll be teenagers not wanting us to even breathe in their direction. But that doesn’t mean how we feel right here, right now, isn’t valid. It doesn’t mean this shit isn’t hard. Because it is. It’s exhausting, and we’re allowed to acknowledge that. We, as human beings, are allowed to say “hey, you know what, I adore my kids. But most days I really hate the job of parenting.”

I see you. Keep going. You’re nailing it.